Of all the gin joints…

Ah Morocco, you’re like a high school relationship. I love you, I can’t seem to get enough of you, and then, I’m emotionally exhausted listening to the lyrical poetry of Jewel while simultaneously trying to figure out how quickly I can leave you. Yeah, now we’re traveling folks! If there is one word that sums up our experiences in Morocco its “dichotomy”.

Dichotomy – a division or contrast between two things that are or are represented as being opposed or entirely different.

 

By the end of this post, we think you’ll know what we mean.  

Something we want you to keep in mind as you read this, a manifestation of our internal dialogue and strife, is that this country is amazing. The people we met and interacted with were so nice, welcoming, and fun. They are eager to invite you into their home or shop to share some mint tea and chat for a bit. Mint tea is delicious by the way. It may or may not have to do with the metric ton of sugar they put in it, but we’ll let you and your blood sugar medication decide if its too sweet.

The country is as beautiful as it is diverse and at times pretty magical. We only mention this because, as the urban poets Poison once opined, every rose has its thorns. And, well, part of our trip and experience was struggling with some of these. as we’ll get to later.

We land in Marrakech, pretty damn excited to get the next part of our travels going. We’re recharged and ready for what we know is probably the most challenging stretch of our journey as the next month and a half as we travel through some of Africa and the Middle East.  We had heard that it could be a pain to negotiate with the cabbies at the airport so we had our Riad (think guesthouse but always with an open and beautiful courtyard in the middle of the house) arrange to pick us up. Easy peasey. Not sure what all of the chatter is on the Interwebs about Morocco being a challenging place to travel to. I guess some people just don’t know how to do research like us, poor fools.

When we finally get to the medina which is the historical old section of towns in Morocco that are set up like labyrinths, your senses quickly get a punch in the face. Dozens of mopeds whipping by you in “streets” no wider than a large doorway. Donkeys pulling carts, hundreds of people, sooooo much exhaust, people smiling and saying welcome, there are just as many bicycles as mopeds also flying past you, oh, and everyone honking or yelling something, Ok, maybe there’s more than what our “research” could actually prepare us for. As we’d find out, this statement could not be more true. This was a first majority Islamic country, and with the way the American media treats the religion and its people you’d half-expect to have everybody spitting at you if you’re not wearing a hijab. What we found instead, was such a welcoming people, always happy to talk with you and teach you about their country and culture. Never once did we feel unsafe, we could walk around the medina and not worry about anything “bad” happening to us, so to speak. Sure, there is petty crime like in any city, but general safety was never a concern. The medinas are amazing old mazes of tiny alleyways lined with hidden shops, restaurants, mosques, homes, workshops, pretty much anything you can think of. Except bars. Alcohol is not legal in Morocco. Well, kind of. It’s illegal and you can’t find it in the medina, but, you can find liquor stores selling Moroccan wine and beer outside the walls of the medina as well as bars. So, it’s illegal, but there are legitimate businesses, wineries and breweries apparently that will sell it to you in an opaque black bag that conceals anything you may have bought. Oh, and they take credit card. Anyway, the medinas are kind of the cultural heart of the city and where we spent a lot of our time exploring.

As your walking around the medinas, you feel both exhilarated to be in such a unique and wonderful place as well as exposed. No way to really blend in here, and it feels like nearly everybody is either staring at you are saying something to you. Often times to get you to check out their shop, and sometimes as a scam to lure you deeper into the maze and then ask for a tip to get you to where you want to go.  “It is forbidden!” you would hear usually from the twenty-something males hanging out. “You’re going the wrong way!” Luckily we were aware of the con before, so we just relied on Google maps which worked… most of the time.

Aside from the false guides, very friendly older men and women would genuinely offer to help if you looked lost. So many people, mopeds and bikes going by, beautiful wares in shop windows, crowded souks (shops), the constant smell of spices in the air, all happening at once. It often times has all senses bursting at the seams. We had to take our time so we could enjoy and just appreciate the madness around us. It worked most of the time, but sometimes it was just so exhausting never being able to walk anywhere without having to say “la shukraan” (no thank you) dozens of times every time you just wanted some fresh air. But if you did battle through, you were rewarded with amazing sites and some decent deals in the souks after some playful bargaining with the owners. 

One of the main attractions of the medina in Marrakech was the square Jemaa el-Fnaa, a huge area with performers, street food, more shops and, unfortunately, animal entertainment. This was probably the first (and unfortunately not even close to the last) exposure to some pretty awful treatment of animals in Morocco. Monkeys that were stolen (illegally) from the forest forced to perform, snake charmers who apparently use very questionable means of training their snakes, and birds with their feet tied to ropes. Pretty hard to see. So, this was one cultural difference that while we understand it exists, and to some degree why it exists, it definitely colors the experience a bit. It’s just hard to have a good time walking around if you see a donkey being whipped carrying waayyyy too much stuff and having to pee on itself because it has nowhere else to go to the bathroom. See what we mean about dichotomy yet?

Given all the madness and sensory overload that is Marrakech, what should one do? How about pay somebody to bathe you. It’s even better / weider than it sounds. We went to a hammam, which is a traditional Moroccan bath house and had two very nice ladies oil our naked bodies and scrub us raw. It was actually pretty nice, Trent even enjoyed it even with the awkwardness. Not a bad way to escape the crazy.

“Laugh before you die”

While he didn’t really explain its meaning, this was the motto of our Sahara tour guide, Hassan. Hassan picked us up in Marrakech and we weaved our way through traffic up into the High Atlas mountains. By the way, if you ever go to Morocco do not rent a car, unless you hate breathing and life generally speaking. If so, then we here Budget is having great deals. There may be lines on the roads, and there may be other rules and laws, but nobody seems to care. Needless to say that was a lot of white knuckling and nervous laughter from the back seat. Ah, laugh before you die. Got it!

Hassan was with us for three days as part of an organized private tour. We traveled around much of Morocco and got to see a lot of the beautiful landscape as well as the towns and villages of the Berber people. The Berbers are the largest ethnic group in Morocco, they have their own distinct culture, food, and even language. Anyway, the 3 day journey was pretty amazing, but non-stop driving across the country. We got to see some beautiful scenery, including the kasbah at Aït Benhaddou, Where they have filmed some personal favorites like Yunkai in Game of Thrones and Gladiator. Are you not entertained?? Hassan even took us to his family home where his mother gave us tea served with Berber “pizza”, which was a delicious mainly veggie dish that besides being cut into slices, did not resemble traditional pizza so much. We felt very lucky to get to see this side of the Berber life, they are wonderful people. After leaving Hassan’s, we went to our final stop which was an experience that will always stick with us. The last night of the tour we stayed in the middle of the Sahara in Berber tents. The stars were like nothing you could imagine, and the sunrise ain’t too shabby either. The amount of silence was incredible, there was no animal life, there was just nothing but rolling dunes for miles around in every direction. And the most incredible night sky we’ve ever seen. It was so peaceful, tranquil, and just a little unnerving to be honest. After the Sahara, we finished out our tour with a short 8 hour drive to Fes.

Fes was, well… challenging. It is one of largest cities in Morocco and has by far the largest most confusing Medina. More the 9000+ streets make up this maze of shops, homes, donkey carts, and other fun things. It’s also where we spent Christmas. So, Christmas is an interesting time when you’re on extended travel. On the one hand, you’re in an exotic location seeing cool stuff. On the other hand, you miss family, friends, eggnog, Christmas trees, bad Christmas movies, good Christmas movies, and general merriment. Luckily for us, Moroccan Netflix had Christmas Vacation, so we pressed on and had the hap hap happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap danced with Danny f***ing Kaye!

Of all the things we struggled with about Morocco so far with the treatment of animals, and sexual harassment towards Michele, Fes was probably most challenging so far as a couple times we were followed through alleyways by younger men hurling threats because we refused to buy drugs from them. No need to spend too much time talking about it really, but let’s just say that Fes was not our favorite location so far.

From Fes, we drove to the mountain town of Chefchaouen, where we began to feel pretty blue. Chefchaouen was a nice change, a smaller, more manageable medina, surrounded by mountains and the entire historical part of the town is painted a light blue (see what we did there?). It was pretty stunning to see.

The people to people harassment was pretty nonexistent here, which was a welcome change. And they, for some reason, have legal weed here. As long as you follow some glassy-eyed individuals outside of town down some unmarked trails to buy it you’re good to go! Also, there is illegal alcohol sold in normal bars. If you want to buy it “to go”, you get escorted to meet the manager who is behind a bar (with bars between you and him) and place your order with the bouncer who relays it to manager. You are given your illicit goods in a solid black bag and sent along the way. (Here we would like to encourage our parents to stop reading). It kind of made drinking exciting again, like when you used to sneak out to your friends to drink the skunked beer they found in their garage or the vodka you used to steal and then refill with water. Ah, the good ole days! (Okay, parents can continue reading now). Mainly Chefchaouen was about as unique as the blue beauty that it possesses. A couple of nice hikes, and welcome slower pace of life to name a few.

“Here’s looking at you, kid…”

Our last stop in Morocco was Casablanca, as romantic as it sounds, Casablanca was little more than just a city. We did watch Casablanca for the first time while in Casablanca, but aside from the corruption of the local police force, there was not much in the way of similarities. Not a bad city, but nothing really to write home about either. In short, Jewel would not have been inspired to write any of her songs here. Except for maybe “Hands”, which contains the lyrical gem “My hands they’re small I know, and they’re not yours, they are my own.” But, that’s it. None of her good stuff.

So, Morocco, what can we say. We’ll be back! Or maybe not. Simply one of the most amazing, confusing, difficult, welcoming, beautiful and unique countries. What can we say, “You were meant for me, and I was meant for you”. Except maybe not.

From Casa we fly out for the bucket list destination of Cairo, it should be interesting as Cairo is supposed to be more difficult than Morocco. But we leave with open minds and hearts, and just a little weary. Now this feels like traveling!

Quick Hitters:

The Food: The food was actually really quite good here. They have their own blend of spices, and everything is about the freshest food you can imagine. The one thing is the portions tend to be huge, like, Cheesecake factory huge, but healthier. Breakfast consists of a bunch of different breads, lots jams, an egg, and more breads and jams. It’s such a carb and sugar load that you must immediately go back to bed.

Coolest Thing: This is tough, but probably the medinas themselves. Such crazy mazes with so many sounds, people zooming, all sorts of smells, it’s really wild. But, it really does give you a glimpse into a new culture and some of the history.

The Thing That Really Grinds Our Gears: Two way tie here between the horrible treatment of animals and the harassment (especially the kind Michele had to endure) just needs to change.
Something to Consider: We rode dromidaries (camels with 1 hump) to our Berber camp and it was a decision we still struggle with. Although we did our research and chose a company known for taking good care of their camels, we don’t condone the use of animals as entertainment. Therefore, if we had a doover, we definitely wouldn’t have done it. Also, it’s terribly uncomfortable.

Favorite Quotes:
“When we get home, I think we should have a bonfire party to burn all of our travel underwear.”

Time spent in Morocco: 3 weeks
Capital: Rabat
Currency: Dirham